These days it seems as though the enemy is running at full strength, attacking everyone any way he can. For the past week I’ve struggled with my writing in both the blog and my text devotionals. I’ve been tired and every time I promised myself that I would go to bed earlier the opposite happened. It took me a moment to realize where my problem lay and it started with the enemy knocking on my door and me unwisely opening the door. How you might ask? It all began…
It all began with a prayer, spoken out loud. Wait..What? Back it up sister. How can a prayer lead to unwisely opening the door to the enemy? I wanted more of God. I wanted to see myself and others through God’s eyes. Instead of getting frustrated with traffic, I wanted to pray blessings over those crazy drivers out there (myself included 😅 because trust me I can be a crazy driver too). I wanted to be more like Jesus and have a deeper more personal relationship with Him. So I decided I needed to spend more time in God’s Word. And so, I prayed out loud pouring my heart out to God asking Him to show me, teach me, guide me.
I wanted to work on my blog at a certain time, the text devotionals at a certain time, and the devotional book at a certain time. I needed to set aside time to study the Bible so I came up with this really great idea 💡. Reminders. I set up a reminder on my phone to work on the blog. Then I set one for working on the text devotionals. I needed to work on the devotional book so of course I adjusted the blog reminder to alternate days between the devotional book and the blog. Perfect! A few weeks went by and I realized I wasn’t getting in my Bible Study that I had wanted to do; I wasn’t studying like I should, and had wanted to start back, spending more time in God’s Word. So, you guessed it, I added a new reminder to set aside time for Bible Study. I had also set timers on my phone games that I played so that I would put it away after so long.
The reminder would go off and I would start to work. Then something happened. It started with adding a little more time to the games. Then it advanced to ignoring the reminders. Sure I would go and work on the blog. I would work on the devotionals (both text and book) but I found myself wanting to spend less time with the important things and more time playing games instead. I started to feel like it was an obligation, that I had to do it, instead of wanting to serve God. Ah, yes, you’re still wondering how a prayer led to all of that. Well….
You see, the enemy also heard my prayer. He heard my desire to spend more time with God and in God’s Word. He heard me wanting to move into a deeper relationship with the Lord and he wasn’t going to have that happen. So he waited for the right time. He took a seemingly innocent great idea to remind myself to budget my time more wisely and used it against me.
As realization dawned on me as to what was taking place I knew what I needed to do. I removed the reminders from my phone. I played my phone games, rested, and started on this post. It’s late and I still have my text devotionals to work on, but I don’t feel obligated. Instead for the first time in over a week I feel as though I’ve come out of a fog. I want to blog. I want to write. I want to study this amazing wonderful book called the Bible. I am thankful that Holy Spirit nudged me and gently steered me back on track. God bless! 💖